I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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