Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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