i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
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