I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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