At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
