We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
