found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
