the new term for farting is butt boxing.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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