never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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