I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Who wears a wallet chain?!
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Randomize
