remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
