I just cut my nipple shaving
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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