i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
soo... how was my night?
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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