those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Randomize
