Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
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did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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