is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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