can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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