I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
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