i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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