can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
