im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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