Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
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