he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont even know how to be here
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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