Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
wow bdsm is so cute
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