it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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