I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Randomize