Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
