Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
So much rum. So many feels.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Randomize
