Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
