Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
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