Got a toothbrush?
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
