I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
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Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
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Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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