So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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