i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I believe in your delicious
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
