how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
