But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Randomize
