Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize