She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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