What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize