No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
