She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
