Texts From Last Night

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  (858): View more from California

  Umm I'm too high to move.

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  (858): Umm I'm too high to move. http://tfl.nu/ye5s
  Replies (7) Good night (1737) Bad night (609)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined

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  (757): now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined http://tfl.nu/1l3f
  Replies (12) Good night (4099) Bad night (1886)
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  (914): View more from New York

  i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition

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  (914): i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition http://tfl.nu/wv3s
  Replies (10) Good night (664) Bad night (2489)
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  (308): View more from Nebraska

  and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs

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  (308): and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs http://tfl.nu/sqwd
  Replies (32) Good night (10083) Bad night (1854)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage

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  (201): Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage http://tfl.nu/vsxr
  Replies (13) Good night (4811) Bad night (1018)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?

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  (814): So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club? http://tfl.nu/yeac
  Replies (10) Good night (3491) Bad night (1169)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos

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  (812): I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos http://tfl.nu/whu2
  Replies (13) Good night (1090) Bad night (728)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors

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  (843): Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors http://tfl.nu/kni1
  Replies (12) Good night (503) Bad night (1596)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.

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  (724): I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser. http://tfl.nu/pdzm
  Replies (6) Good night (502) Bad night (1918)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running

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  (775): What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running http://tfl.nu/dwtn
  Replies (7) Good night (526) Bad night (1389)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"

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  (704): I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!" http://tfl.nu/68n8
  Replies (3) Good night (520) Bad night (636)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.

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  (512): Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man. http://tfl.nu/fxpn
  Replies (2) Good night (544) Bad night (360)
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  (310): View more from California

  They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing

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  (310): They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing http://tfl.nu/3xrl
  Replies (2) Good night (622) Bad night (291)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.

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  (608): He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love. http://tfl.nu/9m9h
  Replies (1) Good night (862) Bad night (292)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.

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  (214): She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE. http://tfl.nu/ol6h
  Replies (2) Good night (603) Bad night (228)

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