he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.