I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
