i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize