i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
