I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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