i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Randomize
