Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize