I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
