He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Someone signed my nipple.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Randomize